The ups and the downs, does it matter


I was at a early morning  prayer meeting and it normally starts with a couple  songs pumped out of the computer. Today  Lloyd chose some oldies.

° This is the air I breathe
° Glory to God in the highest

I’m  not going to hide it. I am going through  some really rough times in my personal life right now. I had a really hard  night (last night). I had to choose to get up early  and go to the prayer meeting. My head was definitely not in doing  it. Every ounce of me was  saying “go back to bed.”  In all honesty the only thing that got me out the door was the thought  of getting on my motorcycle for a morning drive. Well I got up and showed up at least physically. The songs that were played got my attention.

You are the air I breathe made me start to think about what or who is my source. I have been  going through Romans and Ephesians and a key statement is “In Him” throughout the books. I look  to you as my provision. My soul longs for your affection your heart.

Then Glory to God in the highest made me contemplate well what  about the “lowest?”  I feel like I’m in the lowest right now but God I give you the Glory even in my lows. That was a minor epiphany. Glory to God in the highest or lowest of times.” It’s easy to do when all is good but what about the lows? I am not moved or should I say I’m choosing not to be moved by what my circumstances are around me. My life is a mess on multiple fronts it would seem how I react makes a huge difference in the outcome.

Romans 5 :3 (TMT)
Our joyful boasting in him remains uninterrupted in times of trouble; we know that the pressure reveals patience. Tribulation doesn’t have what it takes to nullify what hope knows we’ve got!

Philippians 1 :21 (NIV)
For me to live is Christ, to die is gain.

Because of you, I live in you not in me.  If I choose to live in me call it game over. I will always fall short. You’ve  never had one bad thought about  me. Your heart for me is to receive your affections.

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About Ben Kilen

I am a average guy father of 4. I don't claim any super powers or amazing talents. I do have a double jointed thumb and I have always hoped it would bring me wealth and fame but so far it hasn't. I am an eclectic music lover as long and by music current day main stream rap does not qualify as music. Anything that has one to two sentences hammered over and over with no melody or excessive auto tune does not qualify.

11 responses to “The ups and the downs, does it matter”

  1. Sarah says :

    Lifting you up in prayer today!

  2. Prodigal Chick says :

    I am praying for you Brother!! I pray for God’s peace, love and strength to surround you and that you rest easy under the shadow of the Almighty!! God Bless you and yours!!

  3. Ben Kilen says :

    My original upload of this post was missing a big chunk so I tried to recreate the original…

    In other words this is an updated version

  4. Sarah says :

    I’m nominating you for two awards. If you want to accept them, hop on over to for all of the rules.

    • Ben Kilen says :

      I’ve seen these awards I don’t understand them

      • Sarah says :

        I gotta tell you, it took me over an hour to get it done! Maybe because I use an iPad instead of a laptop which makes everything on this website more difficult?

  5. Sarah says :

    Regardless of all that, your blog is awesome! And now (I think) you have “award nominations” to prove it. 😉

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