Contemplating life this morning, my personal life has had numerous ups and lots of downs in the past few years. I have noticed I have even become jaded towards many of the things I used to take for granted. Because of the downs I have had issues with dealing with others happiness moments, I’ve been jealous and my inner me has shut off emotions and possibly even fostered bitterness inside.
This has a tendency to isolate. I have not noticed it as much due to the fact at the same time I have become very open and honest with other areas in myself. The Cure by John Lynch has been excellent in helping me see the facade I have had put on for 40+ years. Although I still have had areas where I continue to mask. With that being said I have felt I have been more real than ever before. Ask me a question and you may hear more than you want.
But back to the contemplating….
I have shut my self off but in error. I have perceived others happiness but have realized that often my perception is based on what the other person or couple is wanting to have portrayed. Talking with people who seem to have things together or in comparison more together than me… Guess what? They are human to and possibly have more issues than you or me. We are all-out there trying to keep things together, some better than others.
When you see people or things and think that their lawn is greener than yours, remember they are people and have struggles that you may not know that they may be trying to hide whether it’s shame or pride it doesn’t matter. When you see people try looking beyond the mask, look at the person within not the outer facade or mask.
Those people that annoy you, look beyond the actions, change your perspective. Being jaded is not a good thing, it brings bitterness and isolation.
- My identity is not based on my abilities or what others think about me.
- Be real with yourself and others
These are bringing me freedom.
Is that all you got?
Excerpt from The Cure by John Lynch
Then, with a pause and a smile, she clasps my hands in hers, “How are you?”
The last time I answered this one, I was handed a mask. This hostess is nicer, but I’m not convinced. “Fine. I’m doing fine…” The whole room is watching me now, and I see eyebrows tilted in skepticism. My heart sinks. I’m so tired of this. I turn toward the room, all eyes on me, and yell out so everyone can hear. “Hey, everybody, listen up! I am not fine. Not fine at all! I haven’t been fine for a long time. I’m tired, confused, angry and afraid. I feel guilty and lonely, and that makes me even angrier! I’m sad most of the time and I pretend I’m not. My life is not working at the moment! I’m so far behind and freaked out about what to do next, I’m almost completely frozen. And if any of you religious kooks knew half my daily thoughts, you’d kick me out of your little club. So, again, I’m doing not fine. Thanks for asking. I think I’ll go now.” I turn toward the door before I have a chance to break down again. As I grab for the knob, a voice booms from the back of the room. “That’s it? That’s all you got? I’ll take your anger, guilt, and dark thoughts and raise you compulsive sin and chronic lower-back pain! Oh, and did I mention I’m in debt up to my ears? I also wouldn’t know classical music from a show tune if it jumped up and bit me! You’d better get more than that little list.” The room erupts in warm, genuine laughter, and I know it’s not meant to embarrass me. The hostess leans in, nudges me, and kindly smiles. “I think he means you’re welcome here.”
I step into a crowd of welcoming smiles. And there’s not a mask to be seen anywhere. Right away, I wish I’d known these people all my life. You’re in the Room of Grace! Grace!
That word appears 122 times in the New Testament. The Judaizers in the apostle Paul’s day hated it. They feared what it would do if it got loose. “Paul, you can’t tell them this!” they said. “These people are immature, lazy and have little religious background. They’ll abuse it as soon as they can. They’ll live Christianity-lite. These people are weak and want to do whatever they want. And believe me, what they want is not good